Jo holding strength sign

Find Your Personal Strength

There are days when I want to give up. Days when I repeat statements in my mind that sound something like…

“If only I…”
“I wish I had (or had not) done…”
“Why didn’t I do this when…?”

What do all of the above statements have in common? They keep your mind focused on the past.

Your past sufferings should serve as learning lessons that teach you how to live your best life in the present moment. After a painful experience has taken place, focus on what you learned about yourself, accept the event for what it was, then let go and move on.

Don’t attempt to re-live or re-work past events in your thoughts. It doesn’t matter how many times you picture yourself behaving differently in your mind… the outcome will never change. There is absolutely no point to this type of thinking.

The past can never be undone. Everything that happens in life exists to either make you weaker or stronger. You are the one who decides to be weak or strong. Choose to be strong.

I’ll be happy when…
I wish I could…
I’m going to ___ when I finally get ___.

What do all of the above statements have in common? They keep your mind focused on the future.

When we dream about the future, we create links between our current self and the projected idea of the self we would like to become.

Your mind creates visions and goals, because it knows that they are attainable. The only thing getting in the way of achieving your goals is your regret of the past, your inability to accept the present, and your fear of the future. In other words, the only thing getting in the way of your life is you.  You can click on that sentence to Tweet it!

In my video, I explain where my inner strength stems from and how I came to realize the importance of taking action in the “now.”

Life is certainly not simple and some people do have more obstacles and challenges than others.

Take each day as it comes, leave your past behind you and be mindful of your thoughts. When you think about the past, acknowledge your thoughts, learn from them and move onto ideas that will lead to better actions today.

If you can’t take action right now, accept that as a fact and move on. Never dwell.

When you think of the future, break out your desires into actionable items for the next five years, three years, one year, one month, one day. Once you have a calendar of events, focus only on the day that you are on. Of course this is not easy to do. Everyone is a work-in-progress.  Take manageable steps and don’t beat yourself up if you’re not going as fast as you’d like.


Question: Where Does Your Personal Strength Come From?

Please honor my friends and share this video — and don’t forget to live for today.

About the Author

Josephine Bila

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I’m Josephine Bila, LMSW, a licensed social worker for you — the health seeker who craves an energized body, strong relationships, and the willpower to overcome any obstacle.

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  1. Jo, thank you for bearing your soul. You are so right in saying, “your life can change so fast.” So many people don’t realize this. Keep the blogs/vlogs coming…I am enjoying having coffee with you every week. I am so inspired by you and I’m gaining so much strength from these posts. <3

    1. @BettyCorona Thank you, Aunt Betty!  I’m so happy that you’re gaining strength… that’s my goal for anyone who reads these things!

  2. Is it creepy to say that I see a lot of me in your posts? Maybe anyone can relate, but your views always hit home with me. Although I don’t have Thalassemia, I can only relate having known someone with Diamond Black Fan Anemia, and your story really brought back similar memories/thoughts that I had about them. My uncle died at 24 and I’m 27 right now. I feel I never got over his death because he died so young and left me with so many happy memories in the short time that I knew him. I get upset thinking about all the unfulfilled dreams he may have had. 
    On another note… I was reading about the Stem Cell Transplant I’m about to undergo in a few weeks for my cancer and I was surprised to find out that the procedure is also done on Thalassemia patients with the possibility of curing them as well. Do you happen to know about SCT’s? Have you ever had the opportunity to consider one? 
    🙂 So inspired by you. -Nina

    1. @queenglitt Thank you so much, Nina!  It’s good that you remember your uncle and he left you with happy memories.  Find your strength in remembering and honoring him.  Live to the fullest for him, since he couldn’t.  That’s what I try to do.
      A cure for thalassemia was discovered in America (at Memorial Sloan Kettering) and is currently being tested on patients in Delhi.  We will see how it goes.  I’m going to be in a documentary that talks about the origins of thalassemia and covers ground all the way through to the cure and what’s happening in Delhi right now.  Exciting stuff!  The hope is that the patients will survive chemo and accept the transplant.  The entire procedure is risky since patients already have compromised immune systems and an inability to create their own red blood cells.  If things go well, more patients will be cured, until the condition is completely eradicated!

  3. this is touching critical points in our lives ……me too and surely  others experienced similar stories about friends…..and thanks for making us positive

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